I'm not one for adultery - not just out of loyalty, but it just seems that relationships are complicated enough without having more than one at a time, also, with work, dogs, cat, house and garden ....I mean, who's got time for a bit on the side!
But I must confess to an affair with the cat. No, not kinky, but I DID take her into the bedroom onto the bed and I DID do it behind my husband's back - so, bedroom, deceit, pretty much an affair really. If my husband was out, or if I knew that he was really tied up say with watching the news, or a boxing match, then I'd quietly sneak the cat into the bedroom and just enjoy her presence on the bed, as she purred not so much like a steam engine, but rather like wheezy distant thunder if you see what I mean. Just so much enjoyment it seemed almost illegal...
Then one day, she was sitting on my knee (not in the bedroom this time), and I felt my trousers getting rather damp. On investigation, it appeared that following a visit to her facilities, she had neglected to do the paperwork as it were.
Now the poor cat is some undefinable age over 11 (she was at least 3 when I got her in '02), and arthritic to boot. So I quite understand that she has a problem with personal hygiene, and am prepared to help her (rather to my surprise she appears to accept this). But have her on my bed, noooooo.
So, to my husband's chair, I am now vice chair, secretary and treasurer to the Keep Cats Out of the Bedroom Society. Well, they do say that adultery is a messy business.
